Ladyboys are like hobbits; they have big feet. Although, and fortunately, not usually hairy.
My dearest and truest friend, my distant confidante and beloved adopted sister, Andie, is sitting on the brown vinyl sofa in my rented condo in Pasig. She has delicately hoisted the hem of her long floral skirt with one hand and with the other she is holding one of her slippers — flipflops in Filipino — against her leg.
‘Ugh,’ she says. ‘You see? My feet are longer than half the length of my shin.’
She drops the slipper and the hem and takes to regarding her feet with evident distaste, elbow on knee, chin cupped in her hand. She wiggles her toes.
‘I could possibly cut them off,’ she muses. ‘I should cut them off.’
On the tenth anniversary of completing the first draft of The Warm Pink Jelly Express Train, I am republishing this article about it. It describes an affair between a Brazilian transsexual prostitute and a Western straight man.
Poaching is essentially a romanticised memoir; The Warm Pink Jelly Express Train is nothing like that. It is far deeper and more introspective and writing it, shaped my current world view.
My ideas about gender in particular were formed by the research and writing of The Warm Pink Jelly Express Train. Although it is a breathlessly-paced romantic adventure, it required me to dig deep into the natures of gender and sexuality, something I had never done before.
Many people seem to think that ladyboys are a recent phenomenon, but this is far from true. It’s hard to find older material but I found this story on a Philippines website, from a publication that is now defunct. The name of the author is not known. It gives insight into the ladyboy pageant scene in the country and across south-east Asia, and also reinforces the observation that the ‘gay’ and transgender scenes are closely intertwined.
A pageant can be a small local affair with a stage set up on the back of a truck, or as grandiose as the Miss Tiffany contests, held in Thailand, or Super Syrena, in the Philippines.
I classify similarly but use a different terminology (which Ray dislikes.) Homosexual transsexuals I call Transsexual Homosexuals or just transsexuals, while non-homosexuals I call transvestic autogynephiles or just transvestites, even if they do not cross-dress for sexual pleasure or at least, do not admit to it. So in my newer writing they are either transsexual or transvestite, although in older work this might not always be so. We live and learn.
(The reason for inverting the HSTS to TSHS is that all Transsexuals are Homosexual, but not all Homosexuals are Transsexual. The older nomenclature was unfortunate because it made it appear as if there actually was more than one type of Transsexual; there is not. This actually appears to have been Blanchard’s intent, since he wanted to avoid a ‘hierarchy’ between Transsexuals and Transvestites. That, we see today, was unwise.)
She’s transsexual. Her name is Nikki. She’s intact, as you can tell from her bump, but were that not visible, she would not only be a passable but also a beautiful girl.
Transsexuals and transvestites have different characteristics, most notable being their primary sexual orientation: transsexuals are uniquely attracted to men; they are natively homosexual from early childhood, often showing cross-gender behaviours and desires as young as age three. Some transvestites do acquire a form of Homosexuality, which Blanchard called Pseudobisexualism, but this always appears later.
Transvestites display a complex array of arousal models but are always primarily heterosexual. In fact they could be called ‘hyper-heterosexual’, so strong is their desire for femininity. The detail variations are all based on the ‘flavour’ of their autogynephilia, which Blanchard defined as ‘a man’s propensity to be aroused at the thought of himself as a woman’.
We should be aware that ‘arousal’ doesn’t just mean in the sense of becoming sexually excited, though that is a prominent characteristic of transvestites in the West. In fact there appear to be romantic and existential components to Autogynephilia, which is a subtle and complex mental condition. This has led some writers, for example Dr Alice Dreger, to suggest a definition of ‘amour de soi en femme’ — being in love with oneself as a woman. I would put that slightly differently: being in love with the idea of oneself as a woman.
This is obviously a transvestite.
Transvestites always remain transvestites even if they do not physically dress in women’s clothes. In fact, the ‘dressing’ in many cases is entirely mental, it all happens in the sexual fantasy world that transvestites live in. This fantasy, in extreme cases, can lead to a complete detachment from reality.
Sexual transformation from boy to girl has always been hot. Enter the girly-boy: the transsexual or TS.
The oldest records we have prove the early existence of TS individuals, often priestesses or shamans. Their direct descendants are in the hijra of India, the kathoey of Thailand, the bekis and baklas of the Philippines, the travestis of the Americas, Blanchard HSTS and a host of transsexuals, trannies and shemales across the planet.
[kofi]
From the ‘Dancing Boys’ of Afghanistan to the kathoeys and baklas of Asia, from down-town Sao Paulo to Paris, in every culture, all through history, boys become girls in order to attract men. The beautiful girly-boy has always been with us, and she is not going away.
(Note: This is a light-hearted, humorous article. If you are a USican, a feminist or a Western Autogynephile, you might need a humour transplant before reading it. Just saying. Everyone in the pictures is over 18, thanks. Those capable of taking life with a pinch of salt, and wit, read on.)
Today we live in a situation where access to feminising hormones is being restricted, especially for young people. In some cases, as in certain US States, this is the result of draconian and ill-advised legislation. In others, especially where prescriptions are needed to get the preparations, the technique has been to make this almost impossible. This is what happens, for example in the UK.
[kofi]
Feminising hormones are one thing, but what about masculinising ones? This page does not consider these, for several reasons. The first is that in many jurisdictions the possession of Testosterone supplements without prescription is illegal. Another is that Hormone Replacement Therapy and transition generally are far more complicated for females than males. The effects of Testosterone on a female are drastic and irreversible.
We absolutely do not advise anyone to take Testosterone or equivalent except under medical supervision and never, under any circumstances, under the age of twenty. Therefore this page contains no links to suppliers of it.
Plenty of men find transsexuals attractive and will seek them out and even pay in order to have sex with them. Why? The travestis of Brazil and South America might show us.
Hello Daddy. What can I do for you?
In Brazil
Brazilian women are unquestionably amongst the most beautiful in the world, but they tend to be rather short in stature, at least on average. However, many South American men are attracted to the classic Anglo-Saxon standards of beauty—tall, slender, blonde, blue eyes, pale skin and so on. Enter the travesti, as transsexuals are often known in Latin America and parts of Europe. With her naturally greater height she has an immediate advantage in this marketplace. If she began taking hormones young, as many do, there is every chance that she will be naturally pretty, and she will certainly do everything she can to maximise her assets.
The Warm Pink Jelly Express Train is a fast, sexy novel set in Paris. It concerns the lives of two trans prostitutes and a Brian MacMaster, a journalist who falls in love with one of them, Rafy. Soon, Brian’s newshound nose begins to suspect the girls are up to something and he soon uncovers a scandal that brings down the government. It’s an absolutely cracking read.
Gold and God & Goddess Patrons can download the book by clicking the link below.
Autogynephilia is a narcissistic, sexualised self-reward syndrome. It is a non-homosexual man’s compulsive desire to be, or appear to be, a woman. It is satisfied by achieving this, more or less. Although there are other rewards, the most powerful one is by having sex as a woman.
That is to say, by being penetrated, usually anally.
Because it is self-reinforcing, the more often the satisfaction is achieved, the stronger it gets. It is narcissistic because it is focussed on the male self in role as a woman. Because sexualised reward is so strong, autogynephilia is extremely powerful and quickly becomes an obsession. Sex as a woman can turbo-charge it.
I have taken the liberty of republishing in full the pages of the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, Fifth Edition (APA DSM-V) which are relevant to Gender Dysphoria.
If the APA objects, I’ll take it down, but I publish this in good faith, without alteration or comment, as a public information service. I will write another post commenting. I’ll also put a link to this and to the DSM itself (which is downloadable in full as a .pdf) on my Links page.
I strongly advise anyone interested in the field of transsexualism, transvestism, gender dysphoria and related topics to thoroughly study the document below.
Note: The APA now has a programme of rolling revision to its online materials, so the specific wordings may change. This was the state as downloaded in February 2018. As a result, this is only a guide and in all cases of clinical interaction, the current version on the APA website (see link below) should be referred to.
