Men attracted to Transwomen

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Originally posted 2020-07-04 13:05:09.

Men attracted to transwomen are a little-discussed sexual orientation which nevertheless is both commonplace and getting more so.

The men attracted to transwomen are sometimes called ‘gynandromorphophilic’ or GAMP for short. The term gynandromorphophilia was coined by Ray Blanchard, who gave us the current scientific position on transsexualism. He has always been a one for the tongue-twisters too.
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The logic goes like this ‘gyn’ (woman) andro (man) morpho (shape) philia (love).*

GAMP is therefore, an ‘attraction to men in the form of women’ but unfortunately, the term is both ugly and inaccurate.

While Autogynephilic transwomen are indeed men in the form of women, the other type, variously called Homosexual Transsexuals, HSTS, completed Sexual Inverts or just True Transsexuals, are not. They are certainly male but they are not, and never have been, men. In this article we will just use ‘HSTS’ to describe them.

A more reasonable term, therefore, would be ‘Men attracted to transwomen’, which we might, in a humorous moment, shorten to ‘MATT’.

So how might we describe the men attracted to transwomen?

Two Types of Transwomen

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Sam. Apparently. HSTS. Definitely

Transwomen (ie, those women who were born male) fall into two completely distinct and unrelated Types. These were described by Blanchard and confirmed by these studies.

In street and conventional parlance, these women are identified, and self -identify, by a range of names. At one end, they may refer to themselves as ‘trans women’ and at the other, at street level, as ‘shemales’, ‘trannies’, ‘transies’, ‘ladyboys’ (in Asia) as well as a whole host of non-English names that mean more-or-less the same. (It is very rare to hear an HSTS transwoman refer to herself as ‘a real woman.’ Such a claim might indicate that you are talking to an AGP.)

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There are few similarities between the two types men attracted to transwomen, men, other than that they are non-homosexual. That’s right, they are not ‘gay’ and in fact, ‘gay’ men avoid transwomen. Usually the women they are attracted to will be intact, that is, retaining male genitals, but there is a small number of men specifically attracted to transwomen who are surgically transitioned(i.e. who have  a vagina.)

However most men in relationships with such transwomen get involved with their partners by accident. They didn’t go out seeking a transwoman to have a relationship with; they just met someone they liked who happened to be transsexual or, increasingly these days, the girl had her GRS after they met.

Two types men attracted to transwomen

As regards attraction to Autogynephiles, then GAMP, as we describe above, fits well. Leaving aside casual encounters with sex workers, these men are almost all themselves Autogynephilic and some may either partially or fully transition in thecourse of time.

We do not know exactly how many men have GAMP, because we don’t know how many men are Autogynephilic,  but we do know that there are many. This is firstly because of the numbers and profitability of porn sites devoted to transwomen. Then the numbers, globally, of such transwomen working in the sex trade.

A significant number of the transwomen who perform these roles are themselves Autogynephilic and there is — unusually — a tendency for like to go with like, in this case.

On the other hand, fewer men appear to be attracted to the HSTS type and in any case, since they are not Autogynephilic, the term ‘GAMP’, to describe the men attracted to transwomen like this, is incorrect.

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(Please note that there are some men who are specifically attracted to intersex, rather than transwomen. Intersex people are born with a range of conditions that mean that their genitalia and reproductive organs do not conform to the standard binary models.

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We are not discussing these men or women here. We are talking specifically about transwomen, and the men attracted to them. While the current research indicates that HSTS transwomen {the ones attracted to men from childhood} do have an intersex phenomenon that affects brain structure, this does not affect genitalia, which are in the normal range for males.)
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The men attracted to transwomen who are HSTS or True Transsexuals

These men may be attracted to a range of presentations from feminine girly boys, through transwomen to natal women. They are almost always also attracted to natal women. Many, of they are dating, will date both types if they can, though in some cultures this may be difficult. They will often have been, or or perhaps still are, married. They do not self-identify as homosexual and they are sexually repulsed by masculinity exactly as all other non-homosexual men are. They may have wondered if they are gay, given the nature of their attraction, but they usually know they’re not.

They are sometimes said to be bisexual but this is hard to support; they are attracted to femininity and see a transwoman’s cock as a ‘girl cock’. It is also very rare for a man like this to permit himself to be penetrated. In bed he will be dominant and assertive.

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These men attracted to transwomen are outside ‘gay’ culture which, in the West, is a rigid system of behaviours and appearances strictly policed by the ‘New  Gay Man community’ itself. They normally refuse to be counted as part of that community, at least in the West. In Asia, this is unlikely to happen anyway.

Further, the relationship between a this man and a transwoman clearly has much in common with ‘transgender homosexuality’, in which, as J Michael Bailey puts it, only one partner is truly homosexual.

The relationship itself is vanilla; the man penetrates his partner anally during sex. This fits exactly with the HSTS transwoman’s sexual desire and her self-image. On dating sites, these women will often make it clear that they are ‘bottom only’ which means the receptive partner in sex. Despite this, however, they may enjoy their penises and some will be happy  with sexual fun using them, as long as they are not asked to penetrate. Others are classed as ‘Avoidant’ and refuse to allow any contact with their penises.

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In life generally, an HSTS, the True Transsexual,  will play the woman while he will play the man, in everything. When they shop, she will play the wife. When they go out together, he will take pleasure in her appearance, in exactly the same way as he would a natal woman’s. He may feel a ‘trophy status’ and enjoy showing off his gorgeous girlfriend, exactly as he would with a natal woman.

In other words, he will almost certainly exhibit all the flaws that most men do in their relationships with women, because, to this man, his partner is a woman.

An Experience

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So lemme see…you’re HS, you want a man…would you go with this look or Peter Tatchell’s?

Because pre-op HSTS are famously sexually driven, this man attracted to transwomen, if he meets and falls in love with one, will be in seventh heaven. He has just met a probably much younger, very sexy woman who will be upset if he doesn’t make love to her every day. To make it better, if she loves him, she will absolutely dote on him. Being really loved by an HSTS transwoman is quite an experience, too.

This man is put off by all signs of masculinity and himself tends to be genuinely masculine. (The Western ‘gay’ notion of ‘masculine’ is laughable.) He probably likes guitars, cars, guns, motorcycles, photography and masculine music and art forms. He likes action movies, for example, and enjoys, if he’s a reader, thrillers or, on the other hand, factual books. He is not much for ‘woo’ and tends to be pretty grounded.

These men are probably a bit ‘old-fashioned’. They like to hold doors open for women. They don’t expect to go Dutch on dates. They will probably socially defer to their partners in a manner that has become unfashionable in the West; but between the partners, he is always dominant. These characteristics may make such men unpopular with some natal women, but they absolutely delight the HSTS transwoman.

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Perhaps most importantly, the type of transwoman to whom these men are attracted are almost always Blanchard HSTS, the True Transsexuals. They are rarely in relationships with AGPs. This is partly because they are highly attuned to indications of masculinity, and AGPs, typically, are more masculine than HSTS. (This applies even in Asia, though here the differences are much harder to spot than in the West.)

men-attracted-to-transwomenThese men often seek long-term relationships with transsexual women, and are much sought after by these women for this reason. However, transwomen should realise that a specific and powerful attractor for these men is youthfulness, while at the same time they are repulsed by masculinity. As the transwoman ages, unless she takes good care of herself, her man may start looking for a younger, more feminine partner. After all, she should ask herself how he came to be single in the first place!

Such men are usually not homophobic, although they may find certain expressions of the faux-masculinity popular with Western New Gay Men and may even become strident if they think such a homosexual is trying to solicit them. Of course gays themselves are often strongly attracted to their genuine masculinity. However, otherwise they tend to be relaxed and may have a number of gay friends.

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Anal Sex

These men men are likely to have experimented with penetrative anal sex with natal women partners. Indeed they may find anal sex more exciting than vaginal sex. While not all men who do this actively become attracted to transwomen, it does seem to be a precursor. Needless to say, if one likes to penetrate anally, then what’s round the front is of less concern.

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AGP-GAMP or ‘A-GAMP’ men

About half of GAMP men are themselves autogynephilic, that is, ‘attracted to the thought or image of themselves as women’

These men are quite different from the others, although most can’t tell by looking at them. However, with experience, this ability does seem to improve. Once again, they may have been married or have had serious relationships with natal women.

AGP-GAMPs like their partners to have penises as big as possible and specifically dislike small ones. (There is a whole genre of cartoon porn that features drawings of women with impossibly large penises; these men love it.)

On the boards and other areas where such men gather, whenever a favourite porn star has GRS, the howls of protest shake the rafters. It is as if the transwoman had deliberately slighted them. (The other type of men attracted to transwomen tend to support them in this life-choice.)

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As we’ve pointed out, it is common for men with GAMP to be themselves autogynephilic, and this is born out in interview after interview with transsexual sex workers. Many such transwomen keep a wardrobe of women’s clothes specifically for their male clients to wear during sex. Many who work the street or the bars will carry frilly underwear and stockings in their handbag for the same purpose.

Once again, pornography imitates life; there are a number of well-known male porn stars — who exclusively make transsexual porn — who are often filmed in women’s underwear and hosiery.

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Homophobia

AGP-GAMP men are often secretive about their attraction and would rather no-one knew. Since they are usually ignorant, or in denial, of their own Autogynephilia, they may think that their attraction makes them ‘gay’. It doesn’t, but since they are so often homophobic, this becomes a hot-button issue.

AGP-GAMP men are often excessively concerned about their partner’s appearance and if one actually enters into a long term relationship with a transwoman, he will obsess over her clothing and her body.  The A-GAMP is here projecting. He is buying and arranging for his partner to wear the clothes that he himself would like to. She becomes, effectively, an external form of an inner character that his own Autogynephilia has developed, the Autogynephilic artefact.

Sexually, this profile is quite unlike the other type. Most importantly, these men will often, though not always, seek to be penetrated. However, because the men attracted to transwomen in the other group men so rarely do this, the distinction is still important.

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Annie, Thai HSTS

To understand why, you have to cut through the smokescreen of unsupported verbiage that is contemporary ‘queer theory’ and look at some facts. The first is that the act of being penetrated makes a man into a woman, sexually. Men penetrate, women are penetrated.

The men attracted to HSTS/True transsexuals tend to be men; they have no illusion that they might be women, nor any desire to be one.  At the same time they have no desire to be penetrated, so their partner’s reluctance to do so is immaterial.If they have tried being penetrated (more than admit it will have done so) they will have really disliked it. They will have put it down to experience and thrown it into the box marked ‘don’t do that again’.

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The Autogynephilic-GAMP is different. His attraction to transwomen is because he wants to be a woman himself and he believes that being penetrated will make him into one. Indeed, while he is being penetrated, he is a woman, in his mind. This is why these men often seek to be treated roughly; they have grown up with the bizarre idea that women should be hurt in sex.

In a recent study it was found that, in cases where men had died of asphyxiation during sex, about 25% were dressed in women’s clothing. This is a telling clue.

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Homophobic

However, the AGP-GAMP is also homophobic and cannot let a man penetrate him. So his targets are transwomen, who have  functioning penises (the bigger the better) and so can realise his fantasy of being penetrated (and thus ‘becoming a woman’) while avoiding conflict with his homophobia.

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Pegging

These men may experiment with activities like ‘pegging’ where they get their natal women partners to penetrate them using a dildo or strap-on. Some men do this out of simple curiosity, but if it becomes a regular and desired part of the man’s sexual practice, then there is something else going on. If a woman finds her husband asking her to penetrate him with a strap on frequently, she should quietly check the places he hides things. Autogynephilic men do not always cross-dress but most do. There is a likelihood that the woman will discover his cache of ‘dressing’ clothes.

(A noticeable feature of autogynephilia is the extent to which the subjects distort the truth. Autogynephilia depends on a fantastical secret construction that exists in the man’s head. They may not be actually lying, but their version of reality is somewhat at odds with that of others, to say the least.)

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Relationships

Interestingly, AGP-GAMP men are rarely in long relationships with  transwomen. I think this is partly because the transwomen instantly spot the Autogynephilia in them and are repelled by it. Remember that what happens for money is not necessarily what happens in love. Sex workers are only too happy to cater for AGP-GAMP men, but forming an established relationship with one is less appealing.

What may happen, is that the AGP-GAMP man eventually allows his own autogynephilia to take over and transitions too. It is quite common for AGPs to form relationships with other transwomen. Of course, HSTS are uniquely attracted to men, but other AGPs may be receptive to such advances.

I have never encountered a successful long-term relationship between a man attracted to HSTS and an AGP transwoman, although brief encounters are commonplace. Usually the transwoman’s innate masculinity kills it, since these men are repelled by that. (One such correspondent described his relationship with an AGP woman as being ‘like a homosexual relationship’.)

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Blanchard

When Ray Blanchard did his defining work on autogynephilia in the 1980s,  the average age of presentation for men with Autogynephilia was 43, by which time, of course, they were thoroughly masculinised. However, more and more young Autogynephiless are beginning to appear. These individuals can be  attractive as women, though rarely as naturally feminine as HSTS are. We should expect to see many more of these.

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(In Asia it can sometimes be difficult to tell the difference between HSTS and AGPs because both groups there tend to begin taking hormones between the age of 12 and 18. In addition, most AGPs there are either pseudo-bisexual or asexual, though a few exhibit open gynephilia and have girlfriends. However, with experience, this becomes easier.)

Bane

men-attracted-to-transwomenHSTS transwomen, it has to be said, consider AGP-GAMP men to be the bane of their lives, at least in private, though they are a source of income for working girls. The last thing most HSTS transwomen want to do is to penetrate; their desire is to be taken sexually by a powerful, masculine man.

Such a transwoman emphatically does not want to play the male role in sex. As one girl said to me, ‘There’s nothing worse than getting on the bed with a man and the next thing he’s reversing towards your cock like a woman.’

(I know of one long term relationship, of over 8 years, in which the man’s persistent requests to be penetrated eventually provoked his HSTS partner to have GRS. Needless to say, the relationship broke up soon after.)

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The two types do not mix well

One thing to note is that the two types of GAMP men do not generally mix well. This contrasts with HSTS/AGP relations which, while often soured in the West by the AGP’s male competitiveness, in Asia tend to be more relaxed. In both cases, AGPs appear to ‘chaperone’ HSTS, who are generally younger. They may also be sexually attracted to  and attempt to form relationships with them, but HSTS will reject these advances, unless some advantage can be had through them.

I am not sure why Non-AGP-GAMP men feel ill at ease with AGP-GAMPs. I think — speaking purely for myself — that the addiction to living in a fantasy world, which is so characteristic of autogynephilia, may be sensed and disliked by Non-AGP-GAMP men. I note, again speaking for myself, that I rarely get on well with Western AGP transwomen, because of their masculine aggressiveness and defensive attitude. But I have more than a few friends in Asia who are AGP and I get on fine with them. It may be that the social factors that cause Western AGPs not to ‘come out’ until later in life, cause this problem. In Asia, where most AGPs come out in their teens, this is perhaps less apparent – although, like HSTS, they do have to contend with transphobic prejudice.

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4 Replies to “Men attracted to Transwomen”

  1. My husband fits your description of B-GAMP to a “tee”.
    As for me, most people “assume” I am what you describe as HSTS – I started transition in my 20s, live “stealth”, and am post-op; people I encounter in my everyday life have no idea I am trans, and they have no reason to think I’m anything other than an ordinary straight woman. However, inside myself, I think I also fit parts of your description of the Asian AGP. I am not Asian however, I am Latina. As a young teen, I started identifying as bisexual, and had a boyfriend in high school as well as girlfriends. This was years before I came to put the pieces together and identify as trans (late teens).
    Today, I find masculine men like my husband, and feminine trans women equally attractive, but in very different ways. I love my husband’s body, his pheromones, the feeling of his arms around me, and everything about him – I don’t see anything “pseudo” about my attraction to him, or to my previous boyfriends who I was dating before him. My husband and I have a great, loving relationship, spend lots of quality time together, and have an active sex life (although he does prefer the back to the front). So there’s at least one couple like us out there.

    1. Hi and thank you for your response and your very interesting comments about your sexuality. Quite frankly I think that there is something of a scale. We categorise TS as ‘homosexual’ and ‘non-homosexual’ but even extremely HS TS (that is, exclusively attracted to men sexually), definitely show a special affinity for women. I am inclined to think that human sexuality, while broadly conforming to the sexual norms of hetero, homo and bi, is actually more fluid than that. Completely straight men, in the right circumstances, indulge in homosexual sex — prison sex is a classic example. Women do exactly the same thing. Now they could not do that if their orientation was absolute so I think there is a lot more grey area than we usually think. I also think the culture is really important. Here in Asia, transgirls share beds with women all the time; it’s that sort of culture. Once sees whole families sleeping in the same bed and many Filipinos really dislike sleeping alone. But this only works as long as the sexual boundaries are preserved so even if a girl was a bit turned on and feeling sexy, the chances are she’d suppress it, because that is the cultural expectation. For an HSTS this is easy since they almost always prefer to be penetrated, for AGP it’s obviously harder. So although we do set up these almost rigid types we have to recognise individual variation. Also, true bisexualism in humans is woefully unstudied and in TS almost not at all. I do think it’s completely possible for an MtF to be really bisexual (rather than pseudo bisexual) and would still fall into the category HSTS.

  2. This is an amazing article. I relate to so much of it. I am GAMP type A. I look back on years ago, being in Trans clubs and my inability to get on with the other Men……Agree the interests seem different. The GAMP B seemed very typically masculine, and were very open with the world about their attraction to Trans women. They were not so bothered about being muscly, and were not going to fit into a Gay Gym, or other Gay culture places I did. They were typical Masculine Guys. I was not, despite the outward muscle and attitude I would give off.

    Its a shame you won’t get more light put on you. The Woke generation however as you can see with their castigation of JK Rowling, are not open to debate or even looking at things critically. The Orwellian ‘All Trans women are Women, as they say they are’ is accepted by too many.

    I hope you don’t mind this mini essay about Me, a Type A.

    I was a pretty boy, very into the gym, and basically got by on my looks, and would seek out Beautiful Trans , ideally with Big Penises. I was lucky in that my looks got me far, although my lack of people skills caused me problems long term. I could not get on with the GAMP B types, for various reasons, as typically I do not get on so great with Masculine Men, unless of other Ethnic backgrounds as then they dont pick up so much on that despite the Tattoos, and Steroids, I was and am not a masculine man in some ways.

    The pretty Trans who were not versatile, I would still sleep with, however they did not fascinate me in the same way as those that were.
    Despite dating some one very nice well off pretty Asian TS, when she had her SRS, the relationship was done. I missed her beautiful penis.

    It is awkward to admit, yet I did see the TS girls as a fantasy, and part of my prop, in my head.
    I was not honest with some and regret this.

    I did before TS, have a fetish for ethnic women, in general and my Wife would say if I had gone Full Time AGP, I would have been likely to be obsessed with one type of Male – Muscle Guys.
    I am an obsessive person by nature, and to some degree feel once I got bored of bodybuilding, feminisation was always going to be the thing – My self obsession is something I struggle with most days.

    I will also say, despite relationships with some beautiful feminine gay men, I was and am to some degree homophobic. I ruined one very good relationship over this, and basically treated my bfs pretty bad, as I felt I could get away with it, as they adored my poster boy looks.

    I was and am definitely different to the GAMP B. Thank you for explaining why I always felt like an outsider – my motives clearly were different to them. They wanted to find a TS they loved, and could support. I wanted a TS to penetrate me, and have by proxy a interest in their appearance as I wanted to be them, a TS with a big penis, who was beautiful.

    Modern day I have a very attractive Wife, and kids, Wife is surgically enhanced, and uber feminine, yet I have still gone down the Transition route as the desire to look like a Woman particularly the surgically enhanced one with uber curves and a sexualised look was so strong. Once I had a fair bit of money and my sense of maleness was secure with the pretty Wife for all to see, I went for it. It failed for me, as basically a Western AGP is going to have a real tough time looking feminine, all my traits that worked well to look masculine and handsome worked against me. 25k of work made me look like a refined gay man as opposed to the rough manly look I had before, ie an ok cross dresser – thats it, while a HSTS friend I had with no work, could pass fairly well. …..I also, could not lie to myself and others about the reason for why I want to look more Feminine, and to this day still struggle with it. Its about Sex for Me.

    I made my marriage a lot worse with pushing my wife for something she did not want. I regret this too, and wish I had looked more at myself before putting her through this.

    To this day, while I am well aware of what I am, ie a Man, I still would like to find some middle ground on my AGP. I still would hope one day to look more Female I am just sceptical if it could ever work, and who would want to actually be with me.

    I feel now, AGP is something it would be great to be discussed openly, so Men can make better choices. I feel I have met a couple of Asian AGP TS who transitioned young, they acted very different to the typical HSTS, and despite one being very pretty, she was an outsider, so to speak, guess I can work out why now.

    AGPs could do with the world knowing the truth and then maybe we can find some self acceptance and not look for a pretty Wife to fix us, and make us straight…… I would be more open about my struggles, however Im scared of the massive backlash one would get for saying it. The world of Twitter etc is scary, and I’m already BPD, I dont need to make it worse for myself.

    Thank you for this article.